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I've been getting a lot of male attention lately—which is awesome for a chubby chick approaching her 53rd birthday—but only when I'm wearing my very special T-shirt. Plain, chocolate brown in a soft wash-and-wear fabric, it's a walking punchline: a wine opener with the words "Screw It" in sparkly rhinestones. Hot-looking 40-something party boys (I told you I was middle-aged!) do a double take. "LOVE the shirt!" Or they  point to it from across the tasting room with a thumbs up and a goofy smile. 
I'm happily married so that's as far as it goes. But I just had to pass it along to my single readers. I found it on sale at the Taste of Huntington Beach and it's merchandise from a website called "Chris's Stuff." He makes clothes for babies and men, too. But his forte is his line of racy, wine slut tops. Among the sayings:
"Wine Takes the Bitch Right Outta Me"
"Zero to Naked in 1.5 bottles"
"Nice Rack" (with an illo of a wine rack, of course)
"Kiss my Glass"
"Screw the cracker, Polly wants wine" (parrot illo)
"Also Available in Sober!"
You're bound to find something you love. Chris's Stuff is ideal for bridal showers, trips to wine country, or just shopping for you and the girls. He's got pajamas, caps, visors, jewelry, and tote bags. So have fun picking a Tee ($25 to $27) and when you start getting some attention, leave me a comment. I want to hear all about it.—Anne Valdespino

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